Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
Randomize