Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
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