I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
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