Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize