Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
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