Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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