Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Holy sore nipples Batman
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
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