I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
