How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize
