she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
