White coat. Heels.
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Randomize
