He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
