But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
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