stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
