She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
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can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
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That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
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