So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize