Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
