Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Randomize
