Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Randomize