try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
