You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
21 Dirty Secrets From Bachelor/Bachelorette Parties That Have Destroyed Marriages
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
23 Fathers Confess The Best Way They’ve Messed With Their Daughter’s Boyfriend
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.