dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Randomize