"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Randomize
