Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
She just used a chaser for red wine.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
Randomize
