Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
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