WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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