I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize
