More tranny stories later!
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
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