god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
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