He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Randomize
