ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Randomize
