i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
