Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
