I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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