I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Randomize
