your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
