how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
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