he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
