When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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