Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize