Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Randomize
