I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize
