he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Randomize
