From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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