i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
