I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
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