Got a toothbrush?
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
2020 sucks, I want a refund
Randomize
