Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize
