I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Randomize
