Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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