Why are handjobs necessary in class?
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
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